My To-Do/To-Done/To-Doing List

On a lighter-non-emo-note, this is what I've been up to, summed up nicely in this picture!

Number eight is me loving life! :D

Hope - Pt 2: "How Far We've Come"

It's been a little more than a year from now.

Looking back down the road, at that particular spot where I stumbled...


... fell...

    ... hurt myself...

        ... despaired...

            ... cried out...

                ... looked up...

                    ... and reached out for the hands that helped me up.

I remember how it was like... But it's like looking in a cracked and dirty mirror - everything is fuzzy and fogged up.

I remember how it was like... But the focus isn't sharp as it was before.

I remember how it was like... But those memories are from a lifetime ago. As if it were through the eyes of someone else on the outside looking in.

Like faded words on the pages of an old storybook - familiar but only vaguely, and then with a faint sense of strangeness.

Looking back down that road, I can begin to glimpse that slow and subtle journey of recovery. And that not solely on my own account, but a burden shared on the shoulders of others - even those who were once strangers, but have now become steadfast friends.

Yes. I still remember. Honestly, I doubt I will entirely forget.

But at this moment, looking back down this road, I realize how far I've come. Where I am right now. And how much further this road will take me.

Onwards.



Gravity

I remember the day I heard Gravity for the 1st time. I was in the car with my friend Shwe.

Side note: Shwe is the devil herself, but that's a story for another day. Crap, why is the devil even "my friend"? Ah... Life is so random and ironic.

Anyway...

Shwe turned to me and said: "Hey, have you heard this song by John Mayer?"

Previously, all I've ever heard from John Mayer was quirky stuff from his "Room for Squares" album. Yeah, that's the word that came to mind when I thought of his music - "quirky".

Without waiting for an answer, she flipped on Gravity*.

And that is when I heard the best song I've ever heard. In the history of Ever.

Ok, I sense that saying "the best song ever" might come back in the future and bite me in the backside (ya know, just in case John Mayer makes something even more awesome than "Gravity" like maybe, I don't know, "Anti-Gravity". Or "Gravy". Or "Bacon". Yeah, with a song title like "Bacon" it BETTER be the best song EVER.). So here's the obligatory disclaimer: Maybe "Gravity" might not be THE best song I've ever heard. But it's certainly one of the top 10. Or top 5. Or top 3. Or top one and a half. Ok. Fine. The point is it's just like one of the super-bestest-triple-rainbow-unicorn-sharky-bear-songs-that-don't-happen-unless-the-planets-align-and-the-cow-jumped-over-the-moon k?

I was thinking to myself: "Man... This is good. Like really good..."

Just like that time when you were 13 years old, and you had that fan-freaking-incredi-tastic-awesome-sauce ice-kacang/ cendol/ burger/ cake/ pie/ cookie/ pizza/ instant-noodles/ deep-fried-pork-mee and you just knew in your tiny little 13 year ol' heart that your world was forever changed and that you'd never have another ice-kacang/ cendol/ burger/ cake/ pie/ cookie/ pizza/ instant-noodles/ deep-fried-pork-mee as good as that one in your life ever again.

Yeah. It was exactly like that.

The melody is soulful. The backing vocals - humming and rich. The synthesized acoustics - immediately calming and soothing. And the guitar work - subtle, gentle, smooth... Perfect.

And the lyrics?

Nowadays there's a constant noise barrage of so many throw away songs that come out from other artists who are just mass-album-producing-factories who are in it to make a quick buck or get famous, the lyrics are there cos they rhyme with the next line. Or it's catchy. Or it's outrageous (cos, hey, controversy sells doesn't it? Yes, songs like "If You Seek Amy", I'm looking at you...)

But Gravity's lyrics actually mean something.

It's honest. Very well thought out. The whole is much greater than the sum of it's parts. They tell a story.

I'll leave you to find that out yourself. But trust me, the journey and the realization of the message behind the song is just wow. :)

And now I've come to what I've actually sat down to write about: There's one line in the song that holds particular meaning for me, and that line is when John Mayer sings:

"Keep me where the light is."

It's simple yet powerful.

Keep me out from the fumbling dark.

Keep me where I can see where I'm going.

Keep me safe from my greatest enemies - Me, Myself and I.

Keep Me Where the Light is

*To ward off any arguments on ambiguity, the answer is: No, she did not create gravity. "She flipped on" as in "She switched on" the song named "Gravity". Ok? Ya happy now?